It's been hard...

I'm not going to lie, life has been really difficult lately, and while I have so much to post about and so many updates in our life, I haven't been updating my blog much lately, because every time I sit down to type, I feel the tears well up to my eyes when I think about how overwhelmed I've been and how much I'm struggling with the changes that are our life right now.

So, I'll sum it up in bullet points now with some details, and I'll try to be more regular posting on my blog.

- As I posted in early May, we are moving about four and a half hours away from our friends and family, and it's hard. Weston and I are here in Athens while Grant spends most of the week down in South GA. It's hard to be pregnant and alone with a toddler...the emotions are high, and it's just tough. I'm also very sad about moving away from my friends and my home, and it's been really difficult making this transition, and I haven't even had to do it yet!

- My blood pressure is already high at 26 weeks pregnant...I am now making regular visits to my doctor, monitoring my salt intake and drinking lots of water. I'm also trying to relax a bit more, but I'm not real successful being home along with a toddler.

- The struggles of working with a relocation company and a down economy have been difficult...it's been shocking, and we still haven't even made an offer on a house yet. We are hoping that we will make offers this week and next, and we'll be able to move the first week in August, but we still don't know. It's tough...it's emotional to think that we are moving, and we don't have anywhere to live and Weston and William don't have rooms to sleep in. I know they will, but I'm a planner, so this is tough for me!

- Weston is getting tubes in his ears on July 18th...I'm nervous, but I'm also excited. I'm anxious to get past this chapter in our lives where he is living in pain, because his ears hurt. I'm SO grateful that he will finally be able to feel better and hear!

- I'm having to do quite a bit of travel for work, and I despise it...if I never had to travel again for work, I would be happy. I can't stand it, and it's making a me grumpy sometimes, because I don't think that this is a feasible situation when William is born. I don't think there is anyway that I can travel and live this far away from any family. I'm struggling with this...

- Gaining weight...I hate gaining weight, and I know it's inevitable when I'm pregnant. I feel huge though, and I constantly get comments like, "Oh you are big...you aren't going to make it to your due date!" Keep in mind that I'm 5'0 tall, and I don't have much room for this baby to go, so I may look bigger. No matter what, it doesn't make me feel very good.

- The truth...Grant told me that I was gaining weight all over, but it was "normal" for pregnant women. I already feel huge, and I know that I asked him if I was gaining weight, but I just wanted the answer to be "no". He is such a truthful guy, and I know he didn't mean anything by it, but it hurt. I won't let him know that it hurt my feelings, because then he would feel bad, because I know he didn't mean anything by it.

- My marriage! This is probably the biggest thing...Grant and I work together SO well as a team, and we have the things that we do around the house, and we get everything done, and it works perfectly. He spends a lot of time with Weston on the weekends and let's me run errands, so I can get a break after spending all week with Weston by myself, and it's SO nice. He also lets me sleep in every Saturday and Sunday morning. It's great! We have a great time spending time together on the weekends and just enjoying one another's company, but I feel like we are just in this "routine". We don't see one another all week, and it's just like we have so much to do and want to do on the weekends, that we don't just sit and talk to one another. We don't relax or have time to watch movies together in the evenings. We go to bed at different times, because we both have different things that we want to get done, and I don't feel like we have that excitement in our marriage anymore. We don't do anything spontaneous or get to spend time just us together. We are so busy with the move and trying to find a new house that we just don't have time to think about all those romantic things and doing things for one another that makes you feel good. We love one another so much, but it's just hard right now...I know that it's just a phase, and it will get better, but right now, with a pending move and upcoming new baby, it may be awhile, and I know that I have to be patient.

Anyways, I think that's it...though probably enough! Lots of updates and struggles in our life right now, but we are working together, and it will get better all around.

Big Boy

I've got lots of updates and life has been crazy, but for now, I'll leave you with this...our big boy! Weston has been sleeping in his "big boy bed" for about two weeks now, and he's doing great. He likes to get up a little bit earlier than I would like and come in and see us, i.e. 5:45 AM, but he's not getting up all hours of the night, and he's doing really well.

Here is my little guy...

Double Ear Infection, Take 2

So sad to report that Weston has another double ear infection this time with pus in both ears, and our doctor is a bit concerned that his speech may start to be delayed, because he can't hear us. I'm SO sad that it may cause him developmental issues, because he can't hear us.

He's not responding to antibiotics anymore, and he's allergic to penicillin, so we had to do the antibiotic shot today. We have to go back for the second one on Thursday. Hopefully, it works! Anyways, we have a referral to an ENT, and we hope to get in and get the tube surgery quickly! I want my angel to be well!

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we move forward with this journey!

My Little Climber

I was hopeful that Weston would be able to move to a "Big Boy" bed before William arrives, but I know that he's still going to be a bit young when his little brother arrives, so I was worried that it might not be possible; however, Weston decided for me that at a mere almost 16 months old...he is ready for a Big Boy bed!

He may not understand that he is going to be moved and why he needs to stay in his bed right away, but unfortunately, he has to be moved quickly. He has become quite the climber, and he can climb/fall out of his crib even though there are no bumpers and the crib is all the way lowered.

The first time that he did this...he scared me to death! I heard this HUGE thud, and I was sound asleep. Talk about getting my adrenaline running at 6:00 in the morning!! He has done it twice since then, and he has become more and more graceful with each climb/fall from his crib. He definitely needs to be moved out of his crib, so he doesn't get hurt. We are working on converting his crib to a toddler bed, and we are also working on getting a more permanent bed for Weston. (Thanks Amanda!!)

Wish us luck that the move won't be too difficult for us!

This is tough...

Now, my little boy has a double ear infection, and my heart is broken! He spent Friday, Saturday and Sunday nights waking up every 1-2 hours, and I knew that he must have an ear infection. On Friday night, he spent the night with my parents, so Grant and I could get some stuff done around our house in preparation to sell. My mom said he was up and down all night crying, and he might have an ear infection...he had a cold and runny nose last week! On Saturday, he was up every 1-2 hours, and he got up for good at 5:45 AM. It was the same thing on Sunday.

I called at 8:00 AM when the doctor's office opened, and they got me in at 9:15 AM. Dr. Baker, our pediatrician, saw us in the waiting room, and he waved to us, because we are old friends. The nurses said "Hi, Weston!" as soon as we walked in the door. I think that's a sign that we are there too often! Weston has been off the last antibiotic for 11 days, and he's back on another antibiotic. I feel SO bad, and I don't know what to do. I'm at a total loss, and I just feel like a terrible mother. I know that it's not my fault, but I do everything that I can, and he still gets sick. I nursed him for an entire year, and I thought that might help his immune system, but it seems to have made it worse.

My heart is breaking, because I'm getting constant comments from friends, co-workers and some family to the effect of..."OMG, is he really sick again?!" or "Unbelievable! Weston is ALWAYS sick!" or the best one..."What's wrong with that kid?" And I feel bad...those comments are not very encouraging to me and don't make me feel better. I feel like I did something wrong or something is wrong with Weston, because he's always sick. I'm trying so hard, but I still feel like a bad mother, because I can't do anything about it! As I sit here in tears, I just wonder if there is anything else that I can do...Is there something wrong with him that I don't know about that is making him sick all the time? We are going to the allergist on Friday, and I'm praying that he can help us figure something out. I would do anything to be sick all the time and have my little man be well!

Moving

Yup, that's right...our little family is moving! Grant was promoted to Resource Supervisor over our companies Coastal Unit, so we are moving from Athens to Brunswick, GA in the next few months. I'm SO sad about the move, because we will be leaving all of our friends and family, and I've lived here my whole life. But it's a great opportunity for our family, and I'm looking forward to the potential for me to work less hours, so I can spend more time at home with my boys.

The hardest part is that Grant will be moving in the next month or two, but Weston and I will be moving in with my parents while we await the arrival of William in late September/early October. I'm not too thrilled about the idea of finding a new doctor and hospital, so we've decided that it's best for me to stay here with my family and Weston and keep Weston with his awesome daycare provider until William is here.

After William arrives, I plan to stay here for a couple of weeks while things settle with a newborn, and I have some help since my dad works from home, and then the three of us will join Grant in Brunswick. I'm anxious to move forward with the process, so we can find a new house in our new town, and we can get settled in with our things before William is here.

Does anyone live in Brunswick? Or in the surrounding area that reads my blog? I'm guessing probably not, but it's worth a shot...I've started my search for things in the area that we need to find shortly after we arrive, i.e. pediatrician, doctor, gym, etc., and I'd love advice from anyone who is familiar with the area.

Weston @ 15 Months

So, I haven't updated any statistics on Weston in quite awhile, and I feel terrible, because I haven't been keeping up-to-date. Anyways, we had Weston's 15 Month appointment yesterday, so it's fresh on my mind, and I'm going to update.

At 15 months old...
- You are ALL over the place and your pregnant momma can barely keep up! You love being outside, and you pitch fits when we have to come inside or you want to go outside, and we're not ready to go out yet.

- You've started pitching fits when you don't get what you want, and it's not much fun. :) You also pitch some fits when you try hard to do something on your own and you aren't successful. I know that this is just the stage that we are in, but it's stressful and trying at times.

- You talk constantly...you have a big vocabulary for your age. You say the following words: hi, bye, ball, doggie, mommy, daddy, clock, hot, cold, go, car/truck (you currently combine the two into one word), kitty, baby, out, broo (broom) and all done/all gone.

- You have this really soft, sweet voice that you use sometimes...you only use it when you are saying "hi" to little people your size or when you see a baby. Sweet little boy... :)

- You like to figure things out...you were sick last week and on medicine, and you worked SO hard to get the medicine dropper together. After some trial and error, you were successful. You like to put things together and put things where they belong.

- You like to sweep...you hate the vacuum cleaner, but you love the broom. Every time you see it you say "broo" without the m, and you go directly to it to start sweeping the floor. I must sweep a lot! You also do this in the garage with the big broom.

- You repeat what we do and/or say...we now have to be really careful about what we do and say around you, because you are constantly watching and taking it all in.

- You sign more, milk and all done. Other than that, you don't really care to use signs that often.

- You NEVER sit still not even when you are sick...you have yet to watch more than 2 minutes of anything on TV or any movie or cartoon. I suppose that's a good thing, but occasionally it would be helpful if I could let you watch a quick video while I get something done.

- You have been constantly sick since I stopped nursing...we think you have some kind of allergy. We have an appointment with the allergist in a couple of weeks. It breaks my heart when you don't feel good, and it scares me to death when you have a fever that reaches 104.5. You also have eczema, and you've been prescribed a cream for relief. It always gets worse when you have a fever and your body temperature is elevated.

- You've lost weight after being sick last week and not eating, and you weigh 23.4 lbs, but you are still growing, and you are now 33.5 inches tall. I think you got your daddy's height! :)

- You are going to be a Big Brother soon, and I can't wait to see what the future holds for us and our family of four!

- You constantly have bruises on your face, forehead and little legs. You are always falling or tripping, and you have NO fear. You are such a boy! :)

We love you, and we cherish these days that we spend together. We can't imagine life without you, and you completely brighten my day and make my morning every time you look at me, hold your arms up and say "momma" or "hi". I love it!

Note: These pictures were taken with my mom's camera and some of them are a bit blurry, but so cute, and they display W's real personality. So, I had to include them!! :) And SORRY for the picture overload! I can't help it!

Sick Again...

Weston is sick again, and I'm SO sad about it! I stopped nursing Weston around his first birthday (January 20th), and has been non-stop sick since I stopped nursing him. We have been to the doctor or on an antibiotic every single week since I stopped. Did I do something wrong? Should I have done something differently, so his immune system would have built up better? I just can't help but blame myself though I truthfully know that it's not my fault.

It all started with the flu, then he had an ear infection, then he had bronchitis that turned into RSV along with another ear infection, then he had strep throat, then he had pink eye due to a terrible ear infection that was making his eyes inflamed and now he has strep throat again. Seriously?! He just finished his antibiotic for his ear infection last night, so 10 days ago we were at the doctor, and we were back the day after he finished the antibiotic. He woke up around 5:30 this morning with a fever of 103. He had a really red throat, so we decided to take him back in this morning.

He was given another antibiotic, and he was sent for bloodwork. The doctor wants to make sure that he doesn't have mono or something else, because he shouldn't have gotten strep throat while on an antibiotic especially since it was the same one he took to clear it up the last time. I'm SO sad for my little boy, and I just don't understand. How many kids at 15 months old have had strep throat twice?! How many doctors even question mono for a 15 month old?! I'm just really, really sad about it, and it makes me devastated to see the thermometer read 104.

On top of the sickness, he has terrible allergies. He loves being outside, but if he touches the grass, then touches his face...it swells up and breaks out. He sneezes and gets watery eyes outside, and it's just miserable for him. Also, he has a rash all over his neck and body. It's not a bad one, and the doctor says it's just his sensitive skin and the hot weather, but I've tried changing detergents and everything, and he still has the rash. Any ideas on how to get rid of it?

I pray that my child gets better and is able to stay better...I want him to be happy and healthy and enjoy life and not spend it sick all the time. Please be thinking of us if you have any spare time...we haven't had a really healthy last three-four months, and I'm hoping that it turns around soon. :(

It's a...

We had a Gender Reveal Party this past Saturday, April 16th, and we cut into our cupcake to find BLUE! We are having another precious little boy. We are going to name him William Thomas, and we are SO thrilled to be having another boy. We are planning to create a "Big Boy" room for Weston, and William will be moved into Weston's room. We feel so blessed to have two little boys close in age who will play together and have so much fun growing up together!

And it always helps that we have clothes and toys and everything else that is blue and boy! I will post photos from our Gender Reveal party later this week. It was SO much fun, and we feel so blessed to have such wonderful friends and family who share these special occasions with us! :)

Needs for Baby #2

So, obviously, we already have most, if not all, of the baby essentials, and we do not have to buy them for Baby #2. It's definitely easier the second time, because I don't have a list a mile long of needs...but right now, I don't have anything on my list yet for Baby #2.

I know that so many of my blogger friends are pregnant or recently had Baby #2 or #3. What was on your list of needs for these babies? What did you have to have this time around that you couldn't re-use from the first go-around? Was there anything that you didn't buy for Baby #1 but purchased for your second or third?

Any advice is welcome! :)